Who left only one ice cube in the ice tray??

Note: I originally wrote this piece when we owned a refrigerator whose water dispenser was broken. I am happy to say that we now have a new refrigerator with a perfectly working water/ice dispenser so that this particular scenario NEVER HAS TO HAPPEN AGAIN! But, the piece is amusing, nonetheless. :-)



Ever had one of those days when your family seemed to be bound and determined to irritate the ever loving fool out of you?

According to my family, I have these days all the time...or, maybe it's I'm irritated all the time. I'm not sure because I pretty much tune out much of what is said in regards to my moods...mainly because most of it's gross exaggeration. Either way, if you know that I'm irritable or that I'm easily irritated, why, oh why, do you insist on doing things that you know will irritate me?

As an illustration, I got a water pitcher with a filter in it so that, being the health conscious, incredibly wise and caring wife and mommy that I am, my family members could have fresh, filtered, refrigerated drinking water anytime their little hearts desired. The pitcher consists of an large plastic pitcher with a reservoir on the bottom for the filtered water, a reservoir on the top into which you run straight tap water, and a lid on top. It doesn't take a degree in rocket science to figure out how to operate this pitcher. It's quite straightforward, any retarded monkey could make it work...evidently so long as that monkey isn't a 46 year old, degreed professional educator, that is.

The scenario proceeded thusly. I walked into the kitchen, observing the unswept floors and the dirty dishes in the sink with a growing sense of impending doom and despair, realizing that, yet again, I would be on dish duty and floor patrol. I watched, with love in my heart and a song in my soul, my sweet husband, Jeff, pull the filter pitcher out of the refrigerator and pour himself a glass of the nice, pristine, cold water. I observed that there is now about a half inch of clean water remaining in the bottom of the filtered part of the pitcher. I waited to see if Jeff would refill it, but to my horror, he went to replace the pitcher in the refrigerator...without refilling! Now, as sins go, this is probably quite minor, ranking right up there with not flushing the toilet or something, but as I have had to be the one to refill the pitcher the last 28 times it has needed refilling, I took offense to this oversight on his part and proceeded to question his motives.

Me: "What are you doing?"

Jeff: "Getting a drink of water," said with just the slightest hint of sarcastic challenge...like duh? are you stupid, or what?

"Uh, I can see that. Are you planning on refilling the pitcher?" I asked oh so sweetly.

"No, I don't know how," Jeff replied with a barely defensive tone.

"Well, here. Let me show you how!" I now challenged authoritatively.

"No...I really don't want to learn, thanks," he shot back defiantly.

"Look, you twit, it isn't brain surgery. Take the lid off, place the pitcher under the running tap water, fill the reservoir to the desired level, turn the water off, place the pitcher back into the refrigerator, close the refrigerator door," I instructed...with an ever so slight edge to my voice.

"Why are you always so irritated?"

"You want to know why I'm always so irritated?" my voice climbing higher, "maybe it's because the last 328 times that the damn thing needed to be filled, I had to fill it. Maybe it's because," and here I dramatically threw the freezer door open, a Lean Cuisine and eight or nine batteries spilled out onto the floor, "there are two ice trays in here that someone left with only a single ice cube in each of them. Why do I ALWAYS have to do EVERYTHING around here?"

"Yeah, but I still don't understand why you're always so irritated. Besides, you don't always have to do everything around here. I put the dishes in the dishwasher." (Did I mention that, yes, that was two weeks ago?)

Or...something like that. I had to go pour myself a glass of wine and lie down to stave off an impending apoplexy.